Johan vs. Carpenter, June 25, 2009

By Michael Rupp

Well, last night the group got to see a great 11-0 Mets win over the Cardinals behind the arm of Fernando Nieve and the bats of…well just about everyone. One hit in particular stands out. In the bottom of the 4^th inning with 2 outs and a man on Nick Evans stepped up to the plate. Now I had Nick Evans in the home run game which means if he hits a home run everyone owes me one dollar. Also, since we now have seats in left field fair territory we made the stipulation that if the player you pick hits a home run and you actually catch it, everyone owes you $10 because the odds of that happening are incredibly slim. Well Nick Evans connects on a ball that is coming at us. I stand up and it’s now coming right at me. Here it comes. I put my hand out (along with 8 other people) and the ball grazes of my hand behind me. Some clown runs in from the row behind me picks up the ball thus ending the best opportunity I have ever had to catching a ball during a baseball game…and winning $100 at the same time. I’d thought I’d at least get a chance to go to the beach today and listen to an afternoon duel between Johan Santana and Chris Carpenter to kick off my vacation. There is only one problem…no sun. Instead I will kick off my 11 day vacation with a long overdue running diary.

 

12:40 Coming to you live from the Long Island summer home also known as my parents house, I will once again rip off Bill Simmons by trying my hand at a running diary. To get me through the afternoon I will be feasting on the delectable spread of left over Kentucky Fried Chicken from yesterday’s tailgate. I am hoping to get through the game without drinking but let’s be honest, this is the Mets. Things I need to cover over the next 3 hours of baseball:

 

#1 Remembering retired Mets like Jose Reyes, Carlos Delgado and Carlos Beltran.

#2 Explaining the difference between 2,500 and .25.

#3 Venting about the Knicks inevitably screwing up the #8 pick of tonight’s draft.

#4 ABC trying to kill me by creating a reality show with Terrell Owens and Jeff Kent.

 

1:00 Just finished up the Mets pre game on SNY sponsored by KFC. Who knew? I guess marketing does work. I think the Mets should be sponsored by AAA. Lock your keys in your car? Break down on the side of the road? Have half of your starters on the disabled list? Call AAA. I brought up 3 Coronas from the basement just in case. That’s right Corona…the official beer of Los Mets. Even if I don’t drink them I can always pour them out for each year of Oliver Perez’s contract. I am still hoping that Citibank can’t hold up their sponsorship and Banco Popular swoops in. I still wouldn’t mind going to games at El Banco.

 

1:02 Bukhardt and Darling calling the game today??!! Don’t tell me that even Gary Cohen is on the DL?!

 

1:04 You know how a team usually always plays their scrubs on getaway days? Well I know more of the Cardinals scrubs then the Mets normal lineup. How are the Mets only 1 ½ games out of 1^st?

 

1:06 What’s worse than a Bob’s Discount Furniture commercial? A claymation Bob’s Discount Furniture commercial. Yikes.

1:08 Coors is now the banquet beer? What does that even mean?

 

1:10 Brendan Ryan is leading off for the Cardinals after batting behind the pitcher the last 2 games. At least he rocks the high socks.

 

1:11 Ryan rips one to fairly deep center field. F-Mart is able to run it down in the gap to get the out. Centerfield at Citi Field has the same land mass as Canada. Fact.

 

1:12 Skip Shumaker rips a 3-2 pitch into left field for a hit. There goes the no hitter. Rick can pee now. Santana has been hit hard twice and looks a bit erratic.

 

1:14 By the way, lost in the shuffle of my E7 last night was the fact that Rick showed up to the game in the 3^rd inning and immediately went to the bathroom and then Nieve immediately gave up his 1^st. Thank a lot Rick.

 

1:15 Pujols swings 3-0 and pops out to Cora. He looks frustrated with the way the Mets have pitched him. Basically they don’t throw strikes…and are getting no argument from me.

 

1:16 Ryan Ludwick swings late on a fastball and nails Omir Santos’ glove. A rare catcher’s interference call. Ronnie thinks that it is unfair that the defense gets penalized when it is actually the hitter’s fault.

 

1:18 Yadier Molina promptly smacks a single up the middle and it is 1-0 Cards. Of course it is Yadier Molina. Unreal…we give up more runs in strange ways than any other team. Catcher’s interference, balks, passing runners on the base paths…I am inching closer to cracking open a beer.

 

1:19 Ankiel thankfully hits a lazy fly ball to Tatis in left and the inning is over. 1 unearned run for the Cards.

 

1:22 I forgot to mention that both Carpenter and Santana are members of my fantasy baseball team: The Ear Infections. I changed my team name after Joey Votto had to go on the DL for a month because of an Ear Infection. My team name before that was The Bleeding Ulcers. Yes, I also have Ichiro on my team.

 

1:23 Carpenter throws a ball that goes behind Cora and clips him on the foot. Molina still managed to catch the ball. Weird play.

 

1:24 Castillo ground ball to short…Cards can’t turn the double play. If the Cards middle infielders were any good at all we may have set a record for double plays in one series.

 

1:26 Wright flies out to center and Church waves at a curveball to end the inning. 1-0 after 1.

 

1:27 Random thought: I love how U.S. soccer is getting crazy coverage for winning a game. Can I place money on them losing to Brazil this weekend and the country going back to not caring? Can you wager on stuff like this?

 

1:29 The show a kid holding a sign that says “I graduated Pre-K today. Go Mets.”

Burkhardt: That is just great.

Darling: How did he graduate if he is at the Mets game?

Burkhardt: The ceremony was probably early this morning and he took the train in.

Darling: What does he have to do to graduate pre-K…nap well?

 

This combo is working out just fine.

 

1:31 Carpenter singles to right field out of the 8 spot and the Santana walks the 9 hitter Thurston for 1^st and 2^nd with one out. Santana does not look sharp.

 

1:34 Slow roller to short…Mets get a break with Carpenter on second not knowing what to do and the Mets get the force at third. I think Santana has thrown first pitch strikes to 2 out of 10 betters so far. He falls behind 2-0 to Shumaker with Pujols on deck. Lovely.

 

1:36 Santana walk Shumaker to load the bases for Pujols who Kevin Burkhardt just mentioned is 5-5 with 3 grand slams this year with the bases loaded. It is almost Corona time.

 

1:37 Pujols gives me a heart attack by hitting one high to left field but he was jammed a bit. Tatis snags it and the Mets escape.

 

1:38 SNY will have wall to wall coverage of the NBA draft tonight. Good idea…spend your whole night to see if the Knicks can draft a 5 foot 120 point guard from Davidson with the same 1^st name as my ex-girlfriend. This should turn out just great.

 

1:39 Tatis is leading off. That means no double plays!!! However it does mean pop out to second base. I’m getting the feeling that the Mets used up all of their hits last night.

 

1:41 F-Mart strikes out on 3 pitches. I don’t think he is ready yet.

 

1:42 Do we really need to see a replay of the Nick Evans home run last night!!! Come on!!! “I bet Rick called in SNY and asked for more angles of the home run” – Dad. I wouldn’t put it past him after he sent out frame by frame shots to the whole east coast of my attempted catch. I stink. I have now been on TV two days in a row. I hope that is the first and last time that happens.

 

1:47 Burkhardt says that you can argue that Molina is the best catcher in the league. Somewhere Joe Mauer, Brian McCann and Victor Maritnez are flipping the bird. Meanwhile he hits a jam shot single over third. All the breaks are going the Cards’ way early on.

 

1:49 No commercial break after the inning…we are going straight to an interview with Jerry Manual! It’s gangsta time.

 

1:51 Nice bounce back inning for Santana as we go to the bottom of the 3^rd at 1-0.

 

1:52 Manual thinks that Santana wrestled with himself the first couple of innings but is starting to find is groove. If Nieve and Redding keep pitching well than Maine and Ollie will remain in the minors. I love it. Ladies get on the bus.

 

1:55 Santos strikes out looking on a curveball that was inside but the ump went into is strike out call before Santos had a chance to swing. Carpenter strikes out 5 of the first 9 hitters. His curveball is downright filthy right now. I think 1 run might be enough for him.

 

1:56 Cora flies out to right in what is looking like an uneventful game

 

1:58 I stand corrected! Ralph Kiner is about to join the broadcasting booth. Time to grab a beer so I can possibly understand him.

 

2:01 Santana walks Carpenter and Thurston batting 9 bunts him to second. His confidence must be sky high right now. Your thoughts Ralph “Umiofweiuoknfiwefh;oeihf.” Seriously that’s all I hear.

 

2:03 Aflac trivia question: Who were the only 2 NL players with 1,400 hits and a .300 average in the 1980’s? Answer to follow.

 

2:04 Seriously, Kiner is enunciating 1 out of every 3 words. 1 for 3 might get you in to the hall of fame as a hitter, but not a broadcaster.

 

2:05 Darling – “When you have one guy in your line up that is just so much better than everyone else, does that change the hitters’ approach?” That was Ronnie’s nice way of saying that Skip Shumaker sucks. Shumaker strikes out looking. Who does he think he is…Chris “stop calling me Shelly” Duncan. 1-0 Cards heading to the bottom of the 4^th.

 

2:08 SNY is showing a special on the miracle of the 69 Mets tonight. While showing a picture of Tim Robbins Burkhardt says “The special is narrated by Tim Russert.” Dead silence (no pun intended). After the pause:

 

Burkhardt: Um uh Tim Robbins…what did I say?”

Darling: Tim Robbins is such a big Mets fan and I loved Shawshank Redemption.

 

Nice save Ronnie…nice save indeed.

 

2:09 Luis Castillo slaps a single to left. Even Kiner mumbles “Therrrr goes the no hitterrrrrrr.”

 

2:12 Wright hits a double play ball up the middle…but Carpenter gets a glove on it deflecting it into know man’s land. 1^st and 2^nd no outs. The breaks are starting to switch to the Mets.

 

2:13 Kiner just mumbled something about Howard Johnson’s room. I’ve got nothing.

 

2:14 Broken bat grounder that Pujols makes a diving stop for. He gets Wright at second. Nice play but the inning could easily be over. 1^st and 3^rd with one out!...for Tatis. Tatis in his last 16 plate appearance with the possibility of a double play, Tatis has hit into 9 DP’s. Unreal.

 

2:16 Blooper to right…base hit! Mets tie it at 1 and still have 1^st and 2^nd with 1 out. (Clearing my throat)…”HOW BOUT YOU WHIP OUT THEM TATIS!!!”

 

2:17 Ralph Kiner = Jordan Schibler plus 60 years.

 

2:18 F-Mart hits a chopper off the plate but advances the runners to 2^nd and 3^rd for Evans with 2 outs. If the Mets don’t send him down soon I am going to shorten his name to Fart.

 

2:19 Evans hits a shot down the line…fair ball. Church and Tatis score. Ludwick bobbles it in right…I could have played that ball cleanly. 3-1 Mets. Evans for MVP!

 

2:20 LaRussa looks drunk. Shelly Duncan is his designated driver.

 

2:21 There is comedy and then there is Ralph Kiner trying to say “contributed.” I may be going to hell but if you were here you would be rolling on the ground right now.

 

2:22 By the way, the answer to my question from earlier: What is the difference between 2,500 and .25? Tony LaRussa’s managerial wins vs. his Blood Alcohol Content.

 

2:23 Pujols pops up again and is 0-3 on the day.

 

2:25 The answer to the Aflac trivia question: the obvious is Keith Hernandez but the second is Tim Raines. This stumped Ronnie and Burkhardt who both guessed Gwynn.

Ronnie “I helped out Tim Raines a lot by giving up 19 hits to him in the decade. However I did hold Keith to an 0-fer.” If Keith is watching I bet he calls in.

 

2:27 Santana strikes out Molina to end the inning. I think he is done wrestling to himself. 3-1 Mets bottom 5.

 

2:28 Corona commercial…me and SNY are on the same page today.

 

2:29 SNY shows a montage of Kiner’s Corner. I loved that show. Unfortunately half the guests they showed are now dead.

 

2:30 Ronnie says he used to love going on Kiner’s Corner because it meant you did well and it meant you got $100 for the appearance. Oh how the times have change.

 

2:31 Mets go 1-2-3 before I can take a sip of beer. Apparently they are content with 3 runs today…I mean they average 3.1 runs per start with Santana on the mound. We shouldn’t make him feel uncomfortable now that he is in a groove.

 

2:34 Ankiel rips one to left. Church plays it like a deer in headlines. That ball should have been caught…leadoff guy is on second.

 

2:35 Kiner is working a 3^rd inning?! Are they trying to kill the poor guy?! It is humid as all hell.

 

2:36 Burkhardt just called Gary Apple “G.A.” You’re trying a bit too hard K.B.

 

2:37 Gary Cohen is getting the rare day off because his twin daughters are graduating high school today. I hope they have a tad more hair than daddy.

 

2:38 Discussing why LaRussa hits the pitcher 8^th Kiner says “Well Tony is a bright guy, it’s just that he like to show you he’s a bright guy.” Hi-oooooooooooo!

 

2:39 After getting 2 ground outs Joe Thurston gets a 2 out single to center to make it a 3-2 game. Damn.

 

2:40 Athletic play by Johan Santana on a jam shot by Brendan Ryan. Burkhardt teases the bottom of the inning with the “big guns coming up.” Wright, Church and Tatis are the big guns. Life was so much better before Reyes and Delgado retired. I hope they are at least on a beach somewhere enjoying the twilight of their lives.

 

2:43 I have to bring up the new show Superstars on ABC where 8 athletes are paired up with 8 celebrities in athletic competitions. Two of the athletes participating are T.O. and Jeff Kent. Why is the world out to get me? I mean Kent had finally faded away and T.O. went to Buffalo which is essentially the same as fading away. Plus, in week one they face off against each other and I am forced to root for ACL tears. This is not helping my blood pressure. However, watching T.O. get eliminated in week one and chewed out by his super model partner is definitely enough to keep me watching. I mean, he lost the obstacle course to David Chavret formally of Baywatch. I hope Kent’s next challenge is riding a motorcycle…I mean washing his truck.

 

2:48 In the mean time the Mets “big guns” go 1-2-3 in the 6^th. Kevin and Ronnie say good bye to Kiner who is dressed like he is heading to his own funeral. 3-2 after 6.

 

2:52 Cora doesn’t get his jersey dirty allowing Pujols to get a 1 out single to center. Please don’t let this be the start of the downfall.

 

2:54 Ludwick skies one to shallow right. After Castillo drops the glass and ranges back for the play, Church calls him off and makes the catch. When do you think Mets fans will stop cringing when a pop up is hit towards Castillo? End of the year…end of his contract? I don’t see an end in sight.

 

2:55 Sinking line drive to center field…F-Mart comes in to make a diving catch! Very nice play. He just bought himself another game before I start calling him Fart. Get up and stretch everyone. 3-2 Mets heading to the bottom of the 7^th.

 

2:57 For the record, Santana is at 110 pitches. I’d bring him out for the 8^th unless they have to pinch hit for him. However he is getting hand shakes on the bench which I assume means he is done for the day.

 

2:59 Another Mets turn in the order that lasted under 2 minutes. Did a relief pitcher even have time to warm up?! Ronnie referred to Carpenter’s low pitch count as “This is how he rolls!” I say that all the time. I guess a Fairfield education and a Yale education are the same after all. 3-2 Mets after 7.

 

3:02 Pedro Happily comes in for the 8^th. Meanwhile Jason Larue has to spritg in from the right field bullpen as he might need to pinch hit. Feliciano has had 3 days off after pitching in 6 straight. That doesn’t sound like a good formula.

 

3:04 Tyler Greene hits a pinch hit bloop single to center. Time to go refresh my beer.

 

3:05 SCARY sac bunt as nobody went for the ball before Feliciano throws out Khalil Green. Green stepped on Castillo’s foot and Luis is back to limping. Life feels normal again.

 

3:06 Larue does in fact pinch hit and looks like he is still out of breath from his sprint in from right field.

 

3:06 Larue softly lines out to Murhpy at 1^st for the second out. I never thought I see the day where Daniel Murphy comes in for defensive purposes.

 

3:07 Along the bottom line “Lakers sell the 29^th pick in the draft (one of the worst drafts of the decade) to the Knicks for $3 million. Go New York go New York go! Ugh. In happier news Feliciano gets Thurston to ground back to him to end the inning. I would love to see the Mets get at least one more for insurance with Poo Holes due up 3^rd in the 9^th inning.

 

3:11 Oh Danny boy, you’re average is finally rising. A single to left to start the inning for Murphy.

 

3:15 Cora is trying to bunt but Dennis Reyes just does not want to throw a strike. On a 3-1 pitch Cora tries to bunt ball 4 and fouls it back. He then flies out to center field. The Mets do not do small ball very well which does not bode well for this lineup.

3:16 Castillo batting from his power side which means there is a chance he hits it to the outfield.

 

3:19 Dennis Reyes looks like he has been following the David Wells fitness program.

 

3:20 41,200 is the attendance for a Thursday afternoon game vs. St. Louis. It is the highest attendance of the year for the Mets. I didn’t see that one coming. Castillo walks making it first and second with 1 out and Wright coming up. LaRussa stumbles out to the mound for a pitching change. Kyle McClellan is coming in. I have never heard of him. He will probably strike out Wright.

 

3:25 Wright takes a curveball outside for ball four after falling behind 0-2.  Bases loaded for Church. LaRussa is out again. King of the pitching change is going to the well again. I think he does it for his own drinking game. Change a pitcher…do a shot.

 

3:26 “My name is Blake and I am the Chief Shoe Giver for Tom’s Shoes.” Does that read as ridiculous as it sounds on the commercial?

 

3:30 Church fouls of a 3-2 to pitch that would have been ball four but that pitch was nearly impossible to lay off.

 

3:31 Church strikes out swinging on what would have definitely been ball 4. Here comes Jason Motte. If you are scoring from home that is FOUR pitching changes this inning. If there is a god this will come back to bite LaRussa in the ass.

 

3:33 Jason Motte is the former Iona catcher. If a MAAC catcher gets out of this I won’t be pleased.

 

3:35 Motte gets Tatis to pop out in foul territory to end the inning. I don’t have a good feeling about this…even with K-Rod coming in. I might need a Johan Bomb to take the edge off.

 

3:36 1^st 7 ½ innings – 2 hours. Bottom of the 8^th – 25 minutes. Thanks Tony LaRussa…why can’t you pass out like you’re behind the wheel of a car at a stop light?

 

3:37 Chris Shelly Duncan will pinch hit to lead off the inning. I hope he forgot about all the nasty things we said about him last night.

 

3:38 Good morning, good afternoon, good night. You still suck Shelly.

 

3:40 Another strike out for K-Rod. 2 out for Poo Holes. Heeeeeeeeeere we go!

 

3:43 4 straight balls to Pujols. You never like putting the tying run on 1^st but when it is Pujols you make exceptions. Here is Ludwick.

 

3:44 2-0 to Ludwick…did K-Rod lose the strike zone?

3:45 He walks Ludwick on 5 pitches and it is 1^st and 2^nd for Yadier F#$%^G Molina. Seriously.

 

3:46 My Dad walked in the room with 2 outs nobody on and smartly just walked out of the room.

 

3:47 K-Rod just picked off Pujols and he was called safe, but Molina rips the next pitch right at Jeremy Reed. PUT IT IN THE BOOKS! Mets take 3 of 4 from the Cards and gain a little momentum heading into the Subway Series Part Duex.

 

In review:

Santana wrestled with himself for 2 innings before settling down and pitching a solid 7 inning.

Nick Evans had another big 2 RBI’s in his second straight start.

Feliciano pitched a solid 8^th inning on 3 days rest.

Tony LaRussa is a drunk pitching changing fool.

K-Rod lives dangerously but gets the job done.

 

It has been a long time since my last running diary but hopefully a win makes up for it.